By:              Whiskey, Joshua

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Introduction:

In the drama of life, how do you respond?

There are many things that are beyond our control: the person that yells at us, the person that cuts us off in traffic, the store clerk that talks on the phone instead of helping us, the employee that never seems to be there, the spouse or child that pushes your buttons, etc.

Life is like a drama. We all have these crossroads in life.

But will our lives be a “Melodrama or Mellow-drama”.

In the Sermon of Tom Bulkholder Where he talks about Melodrama and Mellow drama he portray a character named Worry Wart.

“Melodrama” and “mellow-drama” are two different terms with distinct meanings:

Melodrama: Melodrama is a genre of drama characterized by exaggerated emotions, sensationalism, and a focus on plot-driven narratives. In melodrama, characters often display extreme emotions, and the storylines tend to have clear heroes and villains. Melodramatic works often emphasize suspense, tension, and dramatic twists. It can be found in various forms of entertainment, including literature, theater, film, and television.

Webster’s New World Dictionary defines a melodrama as “a drama with sensational action, extravagant emotions, stereotyped characters, etc.”

In other words, it is making something bigger than it really is or turning a situation into something emotionally extravagant. Sound familiar?

Richard Carlson in his book “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…” writes “In dramatic fashion, we blow things out of proportion, and make a big deal out of little things. We forget that life isn’t as bad as we’re making it out to be. We also forget that when we’re blowing things out of proportion, we are the ones doing the blowing.” (page 147)

2. Mellow-Drama: “Mellow-drama” is a playful play on words that combines “mellow” and “drama.” It is not a recognized genre or term in the same way that melodrama is. “Mellow” refers to a relaxed, calm, or easygoing disposition. So, “mellow-drama” might be used informally to describe a story or situation where dramatic elements are downplayed or presented in a calm and laid-back manner. It could imply a more subdued or less intense form of drama.

Webster’s New World Dictionary defines a melodrama as “a drama with sensational action, extravagant emotions, stereotyped characters, etc.”

In other words, it is making something bigger than it really is or turning a situation into something emotionally extravagant. Sound familiar?

Richard Carlson in his book “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…” writes “In dramatic fashion, we blow things out of proportion, and make a big deal out of little things. We forget that life isn’t as bad as we’re making it out to be. We also forget that when we’re blowing things out of proportion, we are the ones doing the blowing.” (page 147)

In Act 1 of “Melodrama or Mellow-drama” we looked at the character Worry Wart.

In Act 2 of “Melodrama or Mellow-drama” we examined the individual Stress U Out!

Act 3 of “Melodrama or Mellow-drama” we find Over Re Acting!

Act 3, Scene 1: Who is Over Re Act?

So who is Over Re Act? And what is he all about?

Over Re Act is an individual that reacts “in an excessively emotional way.” (Webster’s)

When somebody does something to them, Over Re Act wants to do that back and more. A lot more.

Every generation has had Over Re Actors in them.

That is why in the Old Testament God set the law:

Deut. 19:21 Show no pity: life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot.

God wants us to control our overreacting.

Act 3, Scene 2: Why does Over Re Act Overreact?

Over Re Act overreacts for various reasons. You name it and Over Re Act has reacted.

From overreacting about a clerk in a store to overreacting about someone driving slow in traffic.

Most of the time overreacting involves anger.

People can overreact for a variety of reasons, and it’s a behavior that can be influenced by emotional, psychological, and situational factors. Here are some common reasons why people might overreact:

1. Emotional Intensity: Strong emotions, such as anger, fear, frustration, or excitement, can lead to overreactions. When emotions run high, individuals may have difficulty managing their responses.
2. Stress: High levels of stress can make individuals more prone to overreacting. Stress can amplify emotions and decrease a person’s ability to think rationally.
3. Lack of Emotional Regulation Skills: Some people may not have developed effective emotional regulation skills, making it challenging for them to control their reactions when faced with intense emotions.
4. Perceived Threat: People may overreact when they perceive a situation or statement as a threat to their well-being, reputation, or self-esteem. This can trigger a defensive response.
5. Past Trauma: Individuals who have experienced past trauma or adverse experiences may be more sensitive to certain triggers and more likely to overreact when those triggers are encountered.
6. Miscommunication: Misunderstandings and miscommunication can lead to overreactions. When people misinterpret a message or believe they are being attacked or criticized, they may react strongly.
7. Personality Traits: Some personality traits, such as impulsivity or a quick temper, can predispose individuals to overreacting in certain situations.
8. Cultural or Social Factors: Cultural norms and social expectations can influence how people express their emotions. In some cultures, expressing emotions strongly is more acceptable than in others.
9. Insecurity: Feelings of insecurity or low self-esteem can lead individuals to overreact in an attempt to protect themselves or assert control.
10. Lack of Perspective: In some cases, people may lack perspective or context for a situation, causing them to react disproportionately to what is actually happening.

It’s important to note that overreacting can have negative consequences, both for the individual and for their relationships with others. Recognizing the reasons behind overreactions and developing strategies for emotional regulation can help individuals respond more calmly and thoughtfully to challenging situations. Therapy, mindfulness practices, and self-awareness can be helpful in addressing overreactive tendencies.

Are you in control of your emotions? Are you easily enraged? God deals with those chinks in our armor through the fruit of the Holy Spirit such as patience, and goodness, and love. Sure better than guns! (From ByLine email, March 30, 2005)

Act 3, Scene 3: How to Defeat Over Re Act’s Overreacting?

How do we turn our character Over Re Acting from a melodrama to a mellow-drama?

How does Over Re Acting defeat the overreacting?

Let’s look at some other overreacters in Exodus 14:27-31.

Þ Over Re Act needs to learn to Trust God – Exodus 15:22-27

God was trying to teach Israel to trust him.

Moses was not their problem. Their lack of trusting God was their problem.

Look at verse 25. The Bible specifically says that this was all a test. Why? Because God did not know what would happen? Or because Israel needed to know what was inside of them?

Over Re Acting keeps facing the same problems over and over and over again because he has not learned the lessons of trusting God.

Over Re Act needs to Remember God’s Miracles – Exodus 16:1-4

Here is another test for Israel. The first test of trusting God was 3 days after a great miracle. This test comes just a month later.

But during this time Israel was following the cloud and the pillar of fire wherever it led them (Ex 13:21-22).

How quickly we forget what God has done.

How quickly we revert back to our old ways, actions and reactions.

Our memory of God’s goodness and His hand working needs to be bigger than the problems and tests of today and tomorrow.

Þ Over Re Act needs to get along with Others – Exodus 17:1-7

Over Re Acting effects the people around him.

Israel’s continual overreacting caused them to strike out at Moses.

Moses was not their problem. The lack of water was not their problem. God was not their problem.

Their reactions to the problems they faced was the problem.

We want to excuse our behavior with others, but we need to see it for what it is. Which leads me to our last lesson…

Þ Over Re Act needs to see his reactions for what it is.

Overreacting needs to see that he is hurting himself and others.

Relationships in his life are strained because of his overreacting.

And his relationship with God will eventually come to a screeching halt until he sees his overreacting for what it is: sin.

A few weeks ago I read this statement in a bank training manual: “We judge ourselves by our intentions, but others judge us by our actions.”

We look at our reactions and look through the eyes of our intentions. But our intentions did nothing at the moment. Our actions on the other hand hurt those around us and usually hurts those we are closest to.

All of us face stressful situations. The problems are not the problem, but how we internalize and handle those problems can be.

Overreacting never helps the situation and usually makes it worse.

Illustration: While hopping about one day, a frog happened to slip into a very large pothole along a country road. All his attempts at jumping out were in vain. Soon a rabbit came upon the frog trapped in the hole and offered to help him out. He, too, failed. Other various animals from the forest made three or four gallant attempts to help the poor frog out, they finally gave up. “We’ll go back and get you some food,” they said. “It looks like you’re going to be here a while.” However, not long after they took off to get food, they heard the frog hopping along after them. They couldn’t believe it! “We thought you couldn’t get out! ” they exclaimed. “Oh, I couldn’t,” replied the frog. “But you see, there was a big truck coming right at me, and I had to.”

1 Peter 5:7 casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.

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